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LETTERS, COMMENTARY, OPINION
1/26/97



WHY CAN'T A WOMAN
BE MORE LIKE A MAN?
Cartoon by Jack Shotton


Only one thing needs to be understood to bring your man/woman debate to a happy close ["International Editors' Forum on Women in Competitive Croquet"]: Men and women are different. They think different, they act different, they want different things, and they will never be the same and nobody can ever make them think or behave like the other sex or play croquet the same way.

So far, so good. But here's where the trouble starts: Men say women are wrong not to think and act the way THEY do. Conversely, women say MEN are wrong not to think and act the way THEY do. And people - men and women - actually get upset about this - which is crazy. Nevertheless, that's what your editors were all saying and doing in one way or another.

Men and women are different. They play croquet for different reasons, in different ways, and with different results. It might be momentarily interesting to ask, with Lerner and Lowe, "Why can't a women be more like a man?" But if the feminist movement has shown us nothing else, it has demonstrated the equal legitimacy of asking, "Why can't a man be more like a woman?"

Men and women are different. It's a waste of time and energy and REALLY STUPID to get angry and upset about it, because that's just the way it is, and that's the way it's going to be, forever. Get used to it!

--Byron Callas, New York, New York



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